They call people like us hopeless romantics for a reason.
(Source: th1s1snottheend)
I know no one will read this, but oh well..
I’m Belle and I’m 16. I may be young and naive, but I know one thing for sure, and that is that I am destined to do something incredible for this world. I don’t know what it is and I don’t know how I am going to accomplish it, but I do know that I will do it. I know this, because I can feel it. I know some people don’t see how what I am about to say is possible, but I believe it, so I will say it. God is a nag. And don’t take that as me going against Him. It’s quite the opposite. He nags me in a good way. Constantly, I am reminded that I have big plans to get started on. It’s like he is there poking at my brain and whispering in my ear, “Belle, let’s get to it. Come on, stop sitting around and get started with this..” and I get so upset because I don’t know how to. Everyday I look at my grades and see that I will never be at the level of the colleges that actually matter. In 20 years, I see myself as someone successful with a family and a beautiful life. Not perfect, but happy. I live in a town that I 100% do not belong in. I love my hometown and I think it was the perfect place to grow up in, but I just don’t belong. The city. I need to be there. The people, the busyness, the social aspect, the life of it, the size. That is home to me. I don’t in any way know how to accomplish my dreams. They’re just so big and so unclear. To sit back and really think about it, to be honest, would take too long. Considering the fact that I do it all the time and still have come up with nothing.. I want to be an inspiration to people. To be a leader in whatever I choose to do. Even when I was a little girl, my mom would tell me that I was going to change the world, in a big way or small way. And now that I am older, I know that it is going to be in a big way. HUGE even. I want to know my path, I want to at least have a little bit of an idea of what my life is going to be, but I don’t. I don’t know a thing, and that is why I am scared. I’m afraid that I will look back on my life in 10-15 years and just be ashamed of myself..that I never truly reached my full potential. I don’t want to let myself, my family, or the people I could potentially help down. Life is a journey and sometimes the paths in that journey seem completely hazy. And that’s where I am. Haze.
